Here is what happened. 這是我在去年四月裡某一天的經歷.
那是一個週一的晚上。我在爸爸家待了一個禮拜，很想回自己的家，所以晚上吃完晚飯就回淡水。那裡是完全屬於我的靈性空間。
我上網到十二點多要上床時已經好累了，連臉都沒洗就準備睡覺。我將奧修的mp3撥放出來，他剛好在講關於開悟的事，我想是'Yahoo! The Mystic Rose'這個系列中的一段。其中一位門徒問他「我何時會開悟？」跟我在一月時含著淚問巴關的問題一模一樣。
我在疊床上的衣服時聽到一句話：「沒有任何技巧可以讓你開悟。」我開始豎起耳朵，然後我聽到一些關於時間的話...接著他說了一句驚天動地的話：「你無法成為開悟的...妳此刻就是開悟的！」
當我聽到這句話時，就好像有人按了撥放器的暫停鍵一樣，我的頭腦瞬間停住了。我既沒有同意，也沒有不同意，因為頭腦完全停住了，沒有任何思考思想。
「我」 變成觀照。它是自動發生的。在那狀態下我就了解為何巴關說覺醒後就沒有個人的痛苦。因為每一件事都只是發生在週邊而已。
它就如此發生了。
沒有任何的閃電或氣動，沒有亢達里尼上升，沒有眼淚，沒有情緒，甚至沒有狂喜，它只是一個覺悟，如此而已。與我之前想像的完全不同。
「我」看著這一切，看著我的身體自己到療癒室放東西，上床休息。原來身體真的有它的智慧。
在那一刻之後，我也悟到開悟與個人健康狀態，道德品行，個人衛生及生活型態完全無關。也與通靈無關。
這個狀態持續了約三天。在週二，我打了一個電話給印度的指導老師說我的狀態。我發現我打電話給他時沒有緊張，沒有預期他會說什麼，以及如果他說我沒開悟或我開悟的話會怎樣。
在週三，我請人把心愛的貓兒子接去剪毛。送回來之後我發現他的尾巴上有紅點，仔細一看是血漬，原來他的尾巴尾端被剪到了。但是我沒有很難過或生氣，只是靜靜的看著，然後決定這樣的事還是反應一下，免得有別的貓因為工作人員的不小心受傷。
我完全平靜，就這樣過了三天心如止水的日子。
在這幾天過後，我再回頭看，最令我驚喜的是雖然那個狀態很像白開水，但是在裡面完全沒有「無聊」這回事。
我記得小時後動不動就會說「好無聊。」原來無聊也是頭腦的內容之一。頭腦不見它也不見了。
另外一點比較弔軌的是，在那個狀態下，與身體的認同感消失了。我記得我曾拿起一本流行服飾雜誌翻，卻覺得好像在看外星文一樣，不懂為什麼這樣叫作好看或美女。但是也有一點忽略身體的傾向，有一天好像穿著睡衣就出門了。
所以下次如果妳在街上看到一個穿著睡衣像遊民的人....Who knows? 也許那人開悟了！
On monday night I was happy to be back in my own apartment after spending a week in my dad's. But I was on the computer till midnight and was too tired to even wash my face before bed. I played Osho's discourse on my mp3 player, he happened to be talking about enlightenment. actually the question was "when will i get enlightened" by a sannyas, and it was almost the same question i asked Bhagavan in Jan.
I was folding my clothes and I heard "no technique can bring you enlightenment". I started to listen. Then I heard something about "time", and "you cannot BECOME enlightened....", then he said "You are enlightened right this moment!"
When I heard that my mind suddently stood still. It was like somebody hit the "pause" button. I didn't disagree, nor did I agree. It was just blank and not moving.
My heart was still. then I didn't know what he was saying, although I was aware he told some jokes cause the audience was laughing.
I was just witnessing, it was automatic and at that moment i knew in this state there is no personal problem. Things are just happening on the periphery.
It was just like that, no elec. shock, no energy moving, no tears, no big emotional moments, it was just a realization (which is totally different than how i used to imagine it)
In that moment or later i also knew that enlightenment has nothing to do with health conditions, personal hygeine, morals, or any special lifestyle. It has nothing to do with channeling either.
i also felt that now "enlightenment" has no more special meaning or status for me. It is no longer something so high or far away, or even something so "great" that is reserved for special people.
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